Animated Crap: Kim Possible Royal Pain

Ah Kim Possible a very underrated Disney channel show that ran from 2002 to 2007. For those that aren't familiar with the show it's about a cheerleader who is also a super spy that fights crime and super villains, pretty basic premise I know but the writers always found a way to make the show work and hell it has a huge online fanbase as well so why I'm I doing an animated crap article on it?

Two words Royal Pain.......an episode so horrendously awful that I'm pretty sure even the creators secretly wish that they never made it. Don't believe me? Well then let's take a look.

The episode begins with a school assembly in which Mr Barkin tells the students about the upcoming class president elections. Ron nominates Kim and Bonnie nominates Brick Flag the school's quarterback......yeah here is my first problem with the episode why didn't Bonnie run herself? It has already been established that she is Kim's rival on the cheer squad so it kind of would have made sense for her to run for class president seeing as she is way smarter than Brick.

God we're only a mintue into the episode and already I'm nickpicking the shit out of it. It can't get any worse right? right?

After a pointless scene in a mini golf course Kim is contacted by Wade and he tells her that a king Wallace needs her help. It is here were we are introduced to *shudder* ugh......Prince Wally.

He's only on the screen for five seconds and I already want to punch him

Okay here is the main problem of the episode Prince Wally, now look I understand what the writers where trying to do with him they made him annoying on purpose but being annoying on purpose is still fucking annoying.Wally is the most unlikable one shot character in the entire show and once again just like Rigby in "Do me a solid" this fucker gets away at the end of the episode with no consequences.

Anyway after we are introduced to Wally the king tells Kim some pointless exposition about the Knights of Rodeghan the stock villains of the episode. He tells her about some crappy prophecy and how the knights are out to kill his son. We also get a pointless flashback that looks like it's from a totally different show.

Insert Game of Thrones joke here

And you kind of start to see the other problem with this episode the medieval theme just doesn't fit with the show's tone because well this is supposed to be a spy parody and plots about knights,kings and princes just don't fit with the style of storytelling that the show is remembered for. I mean it's like watching a James Bond movie where James Bond has to protect a princess from the Black Knight I mean it just doesn't work!

After that we get a pretty boring action scene in which Ron's go kart is confused with the Wally's go kart and the knights try to kill him instead. It's dull but it goes by pretty quick so I'll let it pass, anyway the King decides that Wally is not safe at home so he tells Kim to take him back to America. Yeah this episode just keeps getting worse and worse by the minute doesn't it?  

And it's here where the writers give up on the main plot and decide to make the B plot the main plot of the episode I'm not kidding the rest of the episode is pretty much this. Wally decides to run for class president and becomes popular so much so that Ron decides to abandon Kim as her campaign manager to work as Wally's campaign manager. So yeah Ron's a bit of a douche in this episode, And this goes on for 14 minutes! It's like the writers fucking knew that they had a shit episode on their hands so they thought fuck it let's make half the episode nothing but pointless filler!

Anyway the stupid knights finally show up and we finally get another action scene it's a little better than the previous one because it is a lot longer and better animated. Although I think everyone was just rooting for the Knights to kill that fucker Wally to get it over and done with.

They are just as confused as the 5 people that are still watching

Kim saves Wally he wins class president and ends the monarchy of his country.......whoop d fucking do!

Royal Pain is hands down one of the worst Kim Possible episodes out there, it introduces us to the worst one shot character ever, it focuses on a plot that seems out of place for a spy spoof, it has boring villains and worst of all it gives up on the main plot half way through the fucking episode to focus on the B plot that just goes nowhere. And worst of all? It's just fucking boring! I mean there are other bad Kim Possible episodes like Cap'n Drakken, Grande Size Me and Trading Faces but those episodes at least focused on their shitty plots till the end, Royal Pain gives up on the main plot half way though the episode to focus on a cliched plot about being high school president.

And that's Royal Pain in a nutshell an episode so fucking bad that not even the most hardcore fans of Kim Possible like it. And to this day I have yet to meet a single person who is a fan of this show that actually likes this episode and if there is a person that likes this episode it's probably the writer of the episode Madellaine Paxson.

I looked up Miss Paxson on IMDB and I found out that she also wrote an episode of Johnny Test so yeah that explains A LOT!

So fuck this episode and fuck the network executives who green lit it.

Final Rating

-5/10